I celebrate the end of the year on a few different days. Christmas feels like the end of a year because it marks the last days I spent with my father and so I revisit that time and all the years before it that we shared together as a family. There is a Winter solstice gathering with a small group of friends where we gather to extinguish old patterns and bring light to new parts of ourselves. This gathering is with soul friends most of whom I see only twice a year (Summer and Winter solstice). We gather to connect and remember and renew. The last day of the calendar year marks the end of another year of traveling to new places in myself and the world. I reflect on what I did in the year and what I want the next year to bring. My birthday, in mid-January, marks the end of one year of choices and the beginning of another. On this day, I often celebrate with old friends who have become my family here in Grand Rapids. It seems fitting somehow that this time of year, which by its very nature lends itself to introspection, affords me so many opportunities to review where I’ve been and set upon a new direction for the coming year.
I’m not sure what this next year has in store for me but I know it will bring big changes. I start my new job in just a few days and am very excited about the new life that will come with it. I’ll be working for a multi-physician practice in northeast Grand Rapids. There is a large staff there and I’m hoping to make some new friends with this group of coworkers. My position there is a new one as the office transitions into a new way of managing patient care. They are incorporating electronic medical records and plan to begin construction on a new office, too. This last year I met lots of fellow motorcyclists and I’m looking forward to the trips we will take together- whether for a few hours or a weekend getaway. This last year I also committed to writing consistently and began meeting with 2 other writers; we challenge, nurture and support each other and because of this we are growing as writers and women. This next year we plan to offer our writing to others both in print and through performance. What a year awaits me!
It was raining this morning when I woke up. That’s not a sound I expected to hear outside my window on December 31st. It comes with a little excitement because that means it’s warm enough to take the bike out for a ride. I wonder if I’ll see any bikes out on the road today. I wonder how many other rider friends think of mid-Winter rain in terms of a chance to ride.
I’ve been reading fiction again and am enjoying it. I don’t mean to say I’m enjoying all the books I picked up from the library- that isn’t true. Half of them go back with just a chapter or two read. I’ve got less patience for things that don’t interest me. One book about Mary Magdalen took me back to biblical times for a rewriting of Jesus life from her perspective. I thought it would be empowering to see a retelling of this story but so much of the story was the same just with her voice to capture it. I wanted a new story, a new mythology. Another book wore me down after only two chapters. Back to the library they went. And this is good. I’m glad I know what I want and what I don’t. This year brought me that kind of clarity. I’ve got no room in my life for a book that doesn’t hold my attention. There are so many others that will. So I picked up a few other books when I dropped off the unread ones. My current read is written with such style that I am literally laughing out loud. Few writers reach me that way and certainly not as often or with such verve. I have laughed so much I can’t see for the tears rolling down my face. What a writer he is! This book sits next to me as I type and is taunting me now. I’m excited to return to the book, to the story, to the laughing.
Motorcycling is like this, too. My bike sits and waits for me like Christmas morning each day- the promise of a new ride, a new journey, a new story. As this new year begins, I am looking forward to a few trips on the bike. I know I’ll be making another trip to Deal’s Gap with a group of riders who’ve become friends outside of the rides. I know I’ll be taking a camping trip on my motorcycle and I hope to take at least one other long ride to a different part of the country than I’ve ridden before. I’m also continuing to invest more of myself in the motorcycle club that helped me the most – RIDE Motorcycle. I spent a lot of time this past year working with a group of club members to sort out details on the structure of the club and in developing a website that allows members more interaction by encouraging communication in new tech-savvy ways. I know these changes will result in new membership as well as new friendships. And I’m looking forward to the rides we’ll take together.
The end of one year butts up against the beginning of another. I say goodbye to some friendships, a job that didn’t suit me and some habits that just don’t work anymore. And I welcome in new friends, a new job and a new way of being in the world and with myself. It’s time to welcome in all the parts of myself that need expression and all that ways that will happen- with writing, with performing what I write, with new respect and compassion for myself and with lots of laughter, good writing and abiding friendships. Last year, a friend gave me a beautiful quotation from Neil Gaiman that has accompanied me this whole year through. It was a companion to me this year both because of the open-hearted woman it came from and because of the power it invoked. Today, I offer to you the blessing Amy bestowed upon me:
“May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you’re wonderful and don’t forget to make some art- write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.”
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